Happy Birthday poem

To those of you who were born on this day,

a merry happy birthday to you.

May all your wishes come true

Be filled with happiness and

joy, peace, love.

 

Happy, happy, happy birthday to you,

the Lord bless you, prosper you,

Happy birthday to you

and Happy Birthday to me too!

 

 

 

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Social capital-what is it and how do we get it?

What is social capital?

Social capital is, “The network of relationships between people, who work and live together to create a functioning society.” (Definition from Google)

But what does this actually mean? I think examples will help us understand Social capital better.

Here are some ways to increase your social capital:

  • Start a youtube channel
  • quality time with people
  • Toast masters
  • increase participating in current groups/clubs
  • trust exercises
  • team building activities
  • being trustworthy and reliable
  • serving others with no hidden agenda or ‘counting’
  • solving problems together

Building social capital is more than just talking to people and it’s not only for extroverts. Social Capital is about making meaningful relationships with other people. You’re not friends with someone because of what they can do for you, but because you value them as a person and you genuinely care about their interests, worries and knowledge.

Let’s go a little bit deeper into each bullet point to better understand how we can build our social capital.

1. Start a youtube channel

This is something I’ve tried to do many times before but failed. I think I might’ve failed in the past because I didn’t have a set goal or focus in mind and because I didn’t work with other people. Being a youtuber means working with people, making sure that your content is good, meets the intended purpose and for the intended audience, and is something people would actually be interested in.

From experience, I’d say it’s easy to create a youtube account and to make the first few videos. But after the first few, without anyone viewing or commenting your videos, it can feel isolating-something that’s the opposite of what social capital is about.

So if you’re looking for a quick way to build social capital, being a youtuber is not one. You need to have patience, determination, a subject you’re passionate about, a team, and technical skills. But in terms of slowly building an audience, it’s a good one. Also keep in mind, that if you love making videos or if you have knowledge in a subject, it doesn’t hurt to make youtube videos just for the fun of it.

2. Quality time with people

This is probably the cheapest but trickiest way to build social capital. On one hand, it’s an obvious way, but on the other hand, having high quality time with others can be really challenging. Quality time does not mean eating together, watching tv, playing a game or watching a movie. Quality time tends to mean talking and not everyone likes that. For the introverts, this can be particularly difficult. But quality time, also means listening, not just talking or “waiting for your turn to speak”.

The reason why I say “Quality time TENDS to mean talking”, is because everyone’s idea of quality time is different. For me, I love playing games with my friends. Maybe I don’t get to know about their boyfriend, or a laptop that they recently bought, but I can laugh with them, share jokes and make memories that are meaningful to me. The best times in my childhood was when I played games with my friends.

3. Toast Masters

From what I know of Toast Masters, it’s not available everywhere and it’s not free either. However, for the people who have time and can afford this, I think it’s worth it. I haven’t attended this myself but it looks trustworthy, like somewhere to go to build on public speaking and confidence skills.

4. Increase participation in current groups/clubs

This is something I have to work on in the group that I’m in which is the RICE internship. I need to pick my work off the floor and carry it on my shoulders. I believe that people notice hard workers. But I wouldn’t participate more to be noticed or acknowledged. I want to work hard because I’m passionate about what I believe in and because I don’t want to let my team down.

5. Mathex group

Most of the bullet points (See above) can be under the same heading. I’ve named the heading Mathex group because Mathex is when you’re in groups and you need to work together for a common goal. Social capital is all about building trust in relationships with people. It is about working as a team and using all of your different strengths and knowledge together, to create something you couldn’t have created on your own and solve problems together.

6. Serving others with no hidden agenda or ‘counting’

My sister is very bad at this. She would do something nice for me and then later on, ask me to do something for her. If I don’t want to do it, she reminds me of what she did for me. It makes me feel ungrateful and resentful towards her. So a word of advice, if you’re going to be nice to someone, do it with a cheerful heart and out of love. Don’t count your good deeds. Good relationship is about doing things for each other spontaneously, not because we owe each other anything.

I hope that these six ways of building social capital has helped you to understand what social capital is and how we can build this in our lives.

When I write my post about why we need social capital, I’ll post it right, ‘here’.

But for now, good bye and let’s get social capital building!

 

 

 

 

Laidlaw journey

I thought I’d tell you the story of my journey to Laidlaw College. Get the tissue box ready, it’s pretty sad.

In 2014, I became sick. I was mentally unwell. It’s hard to believe now that I used to be suicidal. I used to want to die. I used to believe that I would by the end of 2014. I know that I believed that because I remembered what it was like, but I can’t connect with the person I was in 2014. I don’t know what she was thinking or how she felt during that time. I only know that it was a dark time.

I once heard or read somewhere that having depression was like having a dark blanket over you. I think it was like that for me. I lived in the dark. No one understood me and my thinking-though logical to me-was deeply irrational.

It’s funny because all throughout my teenage years, I never had a problem with depression or suicide or having too much pressure on myself to do well. I had no school groups, no extra curricular activities and no homework (almost never). But in the last year of high school, when I was “almost an adult”, that was when my brain flipped out.

I guess it was the pressure of suddenly having my whole life in my control. I had to take care of myself. I had to depend on myself more than on my mum. I had a lot of options and didn’t know how to decide. If I made one wrong choice, that was the end of my life.

I won’t give you all the details because it’ll be too much in one post, but I failed Level 3 NCEA. In 2015, I was both lucky and unlucky to be given a second chance at Level 3. This meant going back to year 13 for one whole year. The good news was that I passed Level 3 NCEA. The bad news was that I still think back to that year, and think, “was going back worth it?”

I still don’t know the answer to it. I’m glad I passed, but couldn’t that have been done in less than a year? I don’t know. By the end of 2015, I still wasn’t confident to go to uni. I wasn’t in a good headspace. It was better than 2014, but not good enough for the pressures of uni. I had a gap year and during this time in 2016, went to Australia and Singapore. It wasn’t completely a holiday-I went there with mum to see family.

One thing about where I was at in life, where I was expected to be at that age, and family members with good intentions, is that it doesn’t equal a relaxing holiday. It’s hard to live in a world with people who see the immediate. They see what’s in front of them with no imagination of what’s ahead. I knew great things here ahead of me but at that time, I needed to rest and wait.

But, after the holidays, the Netflix and the nothing, I was bored. So, I decided to enrol myself in NZMA, in a retail Level 3 course. Everyone thought it was a waste of time but I had a vision for myself. It was a vision I couldn’t share with anyone because they’d think I was a day dreamer. As Asians do, they would look at the probability, the cost, my skill set (or lack of) and crush my dreams. I couldn’t let anyone do that.

I didn’t need anyone to tell me I was no good or that I couldn’t do something. I already had enough doubts of my own to deal with. So, like a secret, I held onto my vision, hoping against all rationality, that this was something that could actually work. The course was for 20 weeks, so you could say it kept me busy.

In 2017, I enrolled in Retail Level 4. This was a much challenging course because I had a different tutor. The layout of the course was totally different. I still passed but didn’t learn much. Hopefully that’s not true. I hope I learned something from that. Who knows, maybe one day I can be a tutor there (and re-learn some things).

I was supposed to then enrol in level 5 Business Diploma, which sounds a lot smarter than a certificate, but I decided against it. A new season had arrived and a new passion grew inside me. I wanted to be a primary teacher. I wanted to go to a christian place so I put the two keywords together in the Google search engine and clicked on the first link: Laidlaw.

So thus, began my journey to being a student at Laidlaw College. That’s the very short version of my story. One thing I learned from all these years was that everything that happened, even the bad, all led up to the person I am and where I am now.

What my family members didn’t understand was that, there is a time to work and a time to rest. After graduating school in 2015, it was a time for me to rest. This is something my family probably still don’t understand. I still can hear what they said, echoing in my head, “What are you resting from? You haven’t even started work.”

But for some reason, somehow, I did need a rest and I’m glad I listened to my body and not to “reason. It’s like that saying by Jim Rohn; “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. Guess what they have planned for you? Not much.”

Despite all the nagging, the scolding, the lecturing, I needed to keep to the direction that I knew was right for me. I needed to listen to myself and not be swayed by popular opinion. And as much as I love my family, I’m glad I listened to myself and not to them.

Word of advice: Sometimes we need to rest. We don’t have to be working 24/7 to need a break. It is the rhythm of society’s heartbeat.

 

 

 

 

 

Interns, internships and life lessons

Hi everyone,

This is a boring update on my life. Haha. I’ll try and add something deep and meaningful at the end.

So, a few weeks ago, I applied for an internship and a few days later, I got an interview. Now, I’m not the greatest at interviews. I kind of have that “cool” attitude about me that leads me to reveal way too much, talk way too much and go down all these rabbit holes. When I’m in an interview, I become a different person. It’s almost as if I enjoy talking about myself.

I don’t like talking in general so this was a real surprise that I discovered.

A week or so later, I got a call saying that I’d been accepted to be an intern. I was so happy. Well, okay, I had a lot of emotions going through me. The main one was happiness. After the call ended, this quickly turned into doubt and surprise. I’m shocked they picked me out of the many people who applied. I’m surprised they picked me after everyone I revealed during the interview. I’m pretty sure I implied-and at some point I explicitly said-that I’m not going to be the best intern out of all the interns. And yet, I got the internship.

I’m grateful for this amazing opportunity to learn, grow and also work alongside likeminded people with a common goal and similar interests. I’m not great at team work (which is probably for another day), but I love being a part of the RICE family.

I’m going to be writing a lot more posts on RICE and my internship.

I believe that the reason why I’m an intern is because I am a deep desire to serve God, a desire that was always with me but has only been truly awakened in recent times. This internship is a catalyst that will help me to grow in my faith as well as learn more about the amazing creator of the universe.

One thing that have definitely changed in my life is that I feel the need to read my bible. LOL. I don’t pick up my bible when I’m in church, let alone on a Saturday. But I’m itching to read it and for God to reveal is amazingness and love in the scriptures. That’s really the best way to listen to Him.

The internship, to be honest, is a bit slower than I thought it’d be. It definitely wasn’t what I thought it’d be like- God’s growing me in areas I didn’t even think of.

But it taught me that I need to take initiative. If it’s not teaching me what I expected it would, then take the initiative to take the learning in my own hands instead of relying on RICE. They say the things you teach yourself are the things you  learn the most efficiently because of the level of intrinsic motivation involved.

That’s something that I’m going to keep in mind as I keep on during my internship and explore this amazing time of my life.

See you in the next post.

Thanks for stopping by.

If anyone’s had experience being an intern or a newbie, please give me your advice in the comments section below. Thanks and have a great weekend.

 

 

 

A call For the Sudanese Children

Please forgive the typo in the cover of my book. Yeah, not good. The book is on my blog and Wattpad. Not all the poems are on here. It’s difficult to give away your heard earned money and harder still for me to ask. But I need to ask for these children who can’t ask you themselves. Here are 7 facts about the war that leads to why you should therefore…

Donate here

Dedicated to:

To the child refugees of South Sudan
To all refugees
To my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ

1.They are children

And that makes it everyone’s problem. Child poverty, child refugess, child soldiers, these all exists because of the effect and influence adults have over the world and the world that children lives in. Make this world a better place. Leave this world better than when you had first arrived and can take as little as giving 2 dollars.

2.Because the fight is between adults

And the children are in the thick of it.

3. It is our social responsibility to help cater for the children of the world. All of these children are our children.

Surely, the “every man for himself” only applies to the bill and mortgage paying adult who’s living from paycheck to paycheck. But this doesn’t apply to children because they don’t live in a cash world, because they’re too young to work. Isn’t this therefore, our responsibility, our burden, our duty and our problem?

4. They need us and yes, it’s a matter of life and death

It hurts me to think about how much better the world would’ve been if we had started helping them 5 years ago, since the beginning of the war. Maybe then, we wouldn’t have so many refugees, over half are children.

The thing is, I know it hurts to part away with money especially to give to people who you’ve never met, and don’t know. But the truth is, they rely on people like us, and on charities like World Vision.

I wrote this book, I am fundraising because I acknowledge that it’s a matter of life and death.

Why should you care?

Maybe you don’t have a reason to.

But you know what?

It matters to them that you do.

Donate here

 

Note: My fundraising ends tomorrow, but you can donate directly to World Vision at any time.

 

 

The ones who have died

My heart is in pain,
Heavy weighing like an anchor
When I think of these children whom I do not know
Stuck in a war between adults
Yearning for their family back,
For peace back
And who am I to write about this and their sorrows?
For I do not know them and I can’t help.

Praise be those who has suffered and entered
The mouth of death
The shallow grave of defeat and loss,
Who have risked their lives so that their children may live,
The children whom have died in this insensible war
Makes me think of what we could’ve done in these five years

Don’t worry, for it will be over soon,
And you can always have a new home in a different place,
Don’t long for the old,
Reach for something new,
Something good and you will find it
Reaching back for you too.

Fundraising dinner

For several months, I’ve been fundraising for the Sudanese child refugees. I haven’t been doing a good job of it thought because it’s super embarrassing to ask people for money. I did manage to fundraise more than $100 but that’s only because of my very generous sponsor. Since my fundraise ends on the last day of September, 2018, I thought of hosting a fundraise dinner. These are the pictures. More info on the way. This is my last, “Hurrah”, my final effort in raising more money for these poor children, stuck between a senseless war.

It’s not too late to donate. Please do, as soon as possible if you feel a stirring in your heart, or inclined to give even just a little bit.

 

Thank you 🙂