I hate mornings. I like to skip them completely by sleeping in till lunch time. I may even skip lunch and sleep right till 3 in the afternoon.
But on the morning of this story, I decided to wake up a little earlier at 11am. In my knickers, my bra and a loosely tied robe, I went out of my bedroom, and onto the living room of my apartment that I shared with no one. And had the shock of my life!
I had unexpected guests in my living room, a couple it seemed, and they were eating a slice of cake. This cake, was the same one I had eaten the night before and then put in the fridge to later have for dessert.
“What–what?” I stammered, struggling to get the words out of my mouth, getting all hot and flustered until I exploded.
“What are you doing in my swamp?”
The man looked at me. He looked like he was on the dope and they both looked like they were on the dole.
“Eh?” he said
What would you do if you had strangers, and rude strangers at that, in your house at 11 in the morning? Truthfully, I was still half asleep, it was so early in the morning.
The man look at me sideways, then looked back at the blank TV screen and chuckled.
“I can see your knickers,”
I didn’t even know my robe was untied, I was so tired. But I quickly put my robe over my body and tied it tightly.
“Ge tout o my house, man,” i said “You shouldn’t be here,”
“Chill,” he said
whenever my mother wanted me t know that she was being serious, she would have that deep frown, put her hands on her hips and say; “I’m waiting for you to clean your room,”
So I did a similar thing:hands on hips, deep frown, and said;
“I’m waiting for you to leave,”
The girl raised her hands up in surrender.
“Alright we’re leaving sheesh,” she said
“babe,” said the man
“There’s no drugs here r alcohol,” she said “mama needs her morning fix,”
Morning. I shuddered at the word.
“There’s a bake house across the street from here,”
“A bake house?” asked the man
“Yeah,” I said turning red “isn’t that what you call it? Or is it a farm house?”
I quickly added-“A farm house as in a farm of weeds,”
“My favorite!” said the girl
She kissed the man on the cheek and left first out the front door.
“Good morning,” said the man
Morning. I shuddered, and the rope that tied the robe fell loose and he looked at me and snickered before leaving as well.
I looked down and gasped, horrified, and wrapped it more tightly and tied the robe in a bow.
“Good riddance” I thought “Although, poor Mrs Gilbert across the street,”
Her house smelt of weeds, but it was really just her smelly cats. I was only a little bit smiling.