Let’s connect

Attention all bloggers!

Let’s connect πŸ™‚

IF you visit my blog, I would love to return the favour.

I’m always on the lookout for a good and tasty read.

I can visit your blog when you leave a comment. I’m not saying this just to have comments (although I do feel a bit lonely sometimes). I’m saying this because I can click on your name and that will bring me to your website. You could also leave a link to your website in your comments as well.

Thank you all.

PS: Are you looking forward to this year’s Christmas?

 

Psalm: Help

Another Psalm for the morning, brought to you every Saturday morning at 7am (NZT time).Β 

Thank you Lord for this day

Help me throughout the day

I fall short

Help me faith jump, bridge gaps,

keep my eyes on you while I walk on water.

doesn’t matter,

the waves, the wind, the irrational,

I go to you and in the solus of your salvation, love, kindness and help, I’m safe.

For where I’m weak, you’re strong.

 

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.

 

Note from the author:

I wanted to write in short chunks hence why there’s a sort of listing or bullet point feel to the poem. Why? Because for a morning prayer, it’s pretty long but the good news is, it doesn’t have long sentences or words or unnecessary conjectures.

Solus, means “alone” i.e. We are saved in Christ alone and in his death and resurrection, and nothing else brings us salvation.

This psalm hopefully conjures up a picture in your mind of Peter walking on water towards Jesus. He steps out of the boat, hits the water but doesn’t sink, and continues to walk. Now imagine, it’s not Peter on the water, but it’s YOU.

You’re taking that step out of the boat and you’re walking to Jesus. Keep your eyes on him so that the waves, wind and your rational brain telling you that what you’re doing now is illogical, are SILENCED. So that in the solus of Jesus, there, you find help and that you can do impossible things.

I hope whenever you pray this psalm, you’ll be excited for the day ahead.

Bonus prayer:

IF you wake up and you’re extremely tired, then this is another prayer you could use which says the same thing as the one above:

Lord, Help me walk on water, Jesus’ name, Amen.

 

Have a blessed, water-walking day πŸ™‚

Halloween

I was born and raised in a christian family. There are good and bad things about this. I don’t want to sound or become ungrateful so let’s quickly go through some of the good things.

  1. My mum was widowed in her late 40’s BUT I didn’t come from a broken home. I came from a loving home with heaps of support from relatives, friends, family friends and the church community. This is the kind of support a lot of widows don’t get.
  2. My mum is a blesser. She doesn’t need to have a lot of money to give. Somehow she’s always had enough for herself and a little bit more to give and bless others.
  3. I’ve had a role model and you’ve guessed it-my mum, always being there for me, always being an ambassador of Christ, not through travelling to Philippines for missionary work, but just at home, being a missionary to myself and my siblings.

Now for the bad thing. Actually, there’s just one bad thing I want to talk about:

HALLOWEEN

As a kid, I never celebrated it. Because I was scared, because it wasn’t “christian-like” and because I believed it was a night where people celebrated the dead and the evil forces. But now, through my adult eyes and also as a Brooklyn nine nine binge watcher, all I see are these kids who dress up as anyone or anything (it doesn’t even have to be scary), and go to people’s houses to ask for candy.

That’s pretty harmless. So while, I’m too old for trick o treating, while my family will never understand my need to dress up as Snow White on the 31st of October, while I’ll never encourage my nieces and nephews to trick o treat, I say to the rest of you:

Go out there,

Dress up in your scariest,

and get some chocolate.

 

Psalm for the morning

This is a psalm to be said in the morning before the start of the day.

A morning prayer:

Thank you God for this day. Thank you for all you’ve given me.

Bless my friends and family. Help me throughout the day.

In Jesus name,

Amen

Back story:

I think praying in the morning is important but it can be really hard because we’re still asleep. So this is a psalm and a short prayer that I made to be said in the morning before the start of each day. I wrote something simple but still meaningful. I know this is a short post but I hope this psalm/prayer will help you in praying in the morning, or at times when you need to pray but are really tired for a long one.

Note: If I make a bunch of psalms and put them all in a book, I’d call it, “Psalms for the season.”

Have a blessed day.

 

The five love languages

I recently took part in a quiz. You may have heard of “The five love languages. These love languages are:

  1. Word of affirmation-you like it when people compliment you or when they notice that you cut your hair or did something good
  2. Physical touch-you like hugs and high fives. You may also like dancing or you may squeeze someone’s arm when you get excited.
  3. Acts of service: You like it when people help you with homework, the dishes, mowing the lawn and/or babysitting.
  4. Receiving gifts-This is an expression of love. Of course, make the gift meaningful.
  5. Quality time-spending time with one another with no cell phones, no tv and no other distractions.

My number on love language is Quality Time. Maybe this is why I blog-because I get to share my feelings and opinions without anyone interrupting me or telling me that I’m wrong.

My second love language is acts of service which is closely followed by receiving gifts. I love receiving gifts and it’s especially meaningful to me when the person thought about what to give me. For example, although vouchers can be handy, I prefer it when people actually buy me a product, and not let me choose in the form of a card. My last love language that apparently “doesn’t mean anything to me” is physical touch.

I do recommend everyone takes this quiz to learn more about yourself and others. But I also warn you to not take everything it says as the truth for you. They’re generalisations that may not actually be true for you. For example, I do like physical touch when:

  1. It’s from someone whose love language is physical touch
  2. If I need a massage and that person is good at it
  3. If we haven’t seen each other for a long time- in this case, I don’t hold back on giving bear hugs.

This is the linkΒ to the website and quiz. Try it out now and share with me your results.

 

 

 

 

Social capital-what is it and how do we get it?

What is social capital?

Social capital is, “The network of relationships between people, who work and live together to create a functioning society.” (Definition from Google)

But what does this actually mean? I think examples will help us understand Social capital better.

Here are some ways to increase your social capital:

  • Start a youtube channel
  • quality time with people
  • Toast masters
  • increase participating in current groups/clubs
  • trust exercises
  • team building activities
  • being trustworthy and reliable
  • serving others with no hidden agenda or ‘counting’
  • solving problems together

Building social capital is more than just talking to people and it’s not only for extroverts. Social Capital is about making meaningful relationships with other people. You’re not friends with someone because of what they can do for you, but because you value them as a person and you genuinely care about their interests, worries and knowledge.

Let’s go a little bit deeper into each bullet point to better understand how we can build our social capital.

1. Start a youtube channel

This is something I’ve tried to do many times before but failed. I think I might’ve failed in the past because I didn’t have a set goal or focus in mind and because I didn’t work with other people. Being a youtuber means working with people, making sure that your content is good, meets the intended purpose and for the intended audience, and is something people would actually be interested in.

From experience, I’d say it’s easy to create a youtube account and to make the first few videos. But after the first few, without anyone viewing or commenting your videos, it can feel isolating-something that’s the opposite of what social capital is about.

So if you’re looking for a quick way to build social capital, being a youtuber is not one. You need to have patience, determination, a subject you’re passionate about, a team, and technical skills. But in terms of slowly building an audience, it’s a good one. Also keep in mind, that if you love making videos or if you have knowledge in a subject, it doesn’t hurt to make youtube videos just for the fun of it.

2. Quality time with people

This is probably the cheapest but trickiest way to build social capital. On one hand, it’s an obvious way, but on the other hand, having high quality time with others can be really challenging. Quality time does not mean eating together, watching tv, playing a game or watching a movie. Quality time tends to mean talking and not everyone likes that. For the introverts, this can be particularly difficult. But quality time, also means listening, not just talking or “waiting for your turn to speak”.

The reason why I say “Quality time TENDS to mean talking”, is because everyone’s idea of quality time is different. For me, I love playing games with my friends. Maybe I don’t get to know about their boyfriend, or a laptop that they recently bought, but I can laugh with them, share jokes and make memories that are meaningful to me. The best times in my childhood was when I played games with my friends.

3. Toast Masters

From what I know of Toast Masters, it’s not available everywhere and it’s not free either. However, for the people who have time and can afford this, I think it’s worth it. I haven’t attended this myself but it looks trustworthy, like somewhere to go to build on public speaking and confidence skills.

4. Increase participation in current groups/clubs

This is something I have to work on in the group that I’m in which is the RICE internship. I need to pick my work off the floor and carry it on my shoulders. I believe that people notice hard workers. But I wouldn’t participate more to be noticed or acknowledged. I want to work hard because I’m passionate about what I believe in and because I don’t want to let my team down.

5. Mathex group

Most of the bullet points (See above) can be under the same heading. I’ve named the heading Mathex group because Mathex is when you’re in groups and you need to work together for a common goal. Social capital is all about building trust in relationships with people. It is about working as a team and using all of your different strengths and knowledge together, to create something you couldn’t have created on your own and solve problems together.

6. Serving others with no hidden agenda or ‘counting’

My sister is very bad at this. She would do something nice for me and then later on, ask me to do something for her. If I don’t want to do it, she reminds me of what she did for me. It makes me feel ungrateful and resentful towards her. So a word of advice, if you’re going to be nice to someone, do it with a cheerful heart and out of love. Don’t count your good deeds. Good relationship is about doing things for each other spontaneously, not because we owe each other anything.

I hope that these six ways of building social capital has helped you to understand what social capital is and how we can build this in our lives.

When I write my post about why we need social capital, I’ll post it right, ‘here’.

But for now, good bye and let’s get social capital building!

 

 

 

 

Laidlaw journey

I thought I’d tell you the story of my journey to Laidlaw College. Get the tissue box ready, it’s pretty sad.

In 2014, I became sick. I was mentally unwell. It’s hard to believe now that I used to be suicidal. I used to want to die. I used to believe that I would by the end of 2014. I know that I believed that because I remembered what it was like, but I can’t connect with the person I was in 2014. I don’t know what she was thinking or how she felt during that time. I only know that it was a dark time.

I once heard or read somewhere that having depression was like having a dark blanket over you. I think it was like that for me. I lived in the dark. No one understood me and my thinking-though logical to me-was deeply irrational.

It’s funny because all throughout my teenage years, I never had a problem with depression or suicide or having too much pressure on myself to do well. I had no school groups, no extra curricular activities and no homework (almost never). But in the last year of high school, when I was “almost an adult”, that was when my brain flipped out.

I guess it was the pressure of suddenly having my whole life in my control. I had to take care of myself. I had to depend on myself more than on my mum. I had a lot of options and didn’t know how to decide. If I made one wrong choice, that was the end of my life.

I won’t give you all the details because it’ll be too much in one post, but I failed Level 3 NCEA. In 2015, I was both lucky and unlucky to be given a second chance at Level 3. This meant going back to year 13 for one whole year. The good news was that I passed Level 3 NCEA. The bad news was that I still think back to that year, and think, “was going back worth it?”

I still don’t know the answer to it. I’m glad I passed, but couldn’t that have been done in less than a year? I don’t know. By the end of 2015, I still wasn’t confident to go to uni. I wasn’t in a good headspace. It was better than 2014, but not good enough for the pressures of uni. I had a gap year and during this time in 2016, went to Australia and Singapore. It wasn’t completely a holiday-I went there with mum to see family.

One thing about where I was at in life, where I was expected to be at that age, and family members with good intentions, is that it doesn’t equal a relaxing holiday. It’s hard to live in a world with people who see the immediate. They see what’s in front of them with no imagination of what’s ahead. I knew great things here ahead of me but at that time, I needed to rest and wait.

But, after the holidays, the Netflix and the nothing, I was bored. So, I decided to enrol myself in NZMA, in a retail Level 3 course. Everyone thought it was a waste of time but I had a vision for myself. It was a vision I couldn’t share with anyone because they’d think I was a day dreamer. As Asians do, they would look at the probability, the cost, my skill set (or lack of) and crush my dreams. I couldn’t let anyone do that.

I didn’t need anyone to tell me I was no good or that I couldn’t do something. I already had enough doubts of my own to deal with. So, like a secret, I held onto my vision, hoping against all rationality, that this was something that could actually work. The course was for 20 weeks, so you could say it kept me busy.

In 2017, I enrolled in Retail Level 4. This was a much challenging course because I had a different tutor. The layout of the course was totally different. I still passed but didn’t learn much. Hopefully that’s not true. I hope I learned something from that. Who knows, maybe one day I can be a tutor there (and re-learn some things).

I was supposed to then enrol in level 5 Business Diploma, which sounds a lot smarter than a certificate, but I decided against it. A new season had arrived and a new passion grew inside me. I wanted to be a primary teacher. I wanted to go to a christian place so I put the two keywords together in the Google search engine and clicked on the first link: Laidlaw.

So thus, began my journey to being a student at Laidlaw College. That’s the very short version of my story. One thing I learned from all these years was that everything that happened, even the bad, all led up to the person I am and where I am now.

What my family members didn’t understand was that, there is a time to work and a time to rest. After graduating school in 2015, it was a time for me to rest. This is something my family probably still don’t understand. I still can hear what they said, echoing in my head, “What are you resting from? You haven’t even started work.”

But for some reason, somehow, I did need a rest and I’m glad I listened to my body and not to “reason. It’s like that saying by Jim Rohn; “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. Guess what they have planned for you? Not much.”

Despite all the nagging, the scolding, the lecturing, I needed to keep to the direction that I knew was right for me. I needed to listen to myself and not be swayed by popular opinion. And as much as I love my family, I’m glad I listened to myself and not to them.

Word of advice: Sometimes we need to rest. We don’t have to be working 24/7 to need a break. It is the rhythm of society’s heartbeat.