Four domains of spirituality

It’s really annoying for me that I can’t remember what book I originally got this information from. But on the bright side, Google has everything. 

There are four domains of spirituality and these are:

  • Personal-relation with self
  • Communal- relation with others
  • Environment -relation with the environment
  • Transcendent- the God stuff or transcendence

Let’s skip the argument over whether or not there is such thing as spirituality and spiritual things. Let’s dive deeper into these four domains to gain a clearer understanding on what they are and how we can have spiritual well being in all four domains.

Personal-relation with self

Personal domain—wherein one intra-relates with oneself with regards to meaning, purpose and values in life. Self-awareness is the driving force or transcendent aspect of the human spirit in its search for identity and self-worth.

The personal domain is about the big questions in life such as What’s my purpose? Why do I exist? What is the meaning of life? It also includes:

  • questions about self and life
  • Purpose
  • Values
  • Self awareness
  • Self identity and self worth
  • Journey of discovery

A lot of people go on journey of discovering and finding out who they are and what they’re made of. I’d place a bet that the reason why people enter mid life crisis is because so far, they had been participating in the Rat Race while at the same time, ignoring these questions. Now, they are in a point in their life where they can’t ignore their self awareness anymore. Who are they and why are they here?

Don’t ignore the questions you may have even if they’re scary questions. Face them head on and gain understanding and knowledge. Find out who you are and what you’re made of. What are your values? What do you want out of life?

Communal Domain-relation with others

Communal domain—as shown in the quality and depth of interpersonal relationships, between self and others, relating to morality, culture and religion. These are expressed in love, forgiveness, trust, hope and faith in humanity.

The relationships we have with the people around us is not only a physical thing but has a spiritual aspect to it as well. In christian culture, we say that our relationships have three people, me, you and Jesus.

Jesus is always in the centre of every relationship that we form because without him, there’s no chance that the relationship would last.

However, I believe this because I’m dependent on Jesus. Whether or not you’re a christian like me, or a strong atheist with an atheist youtube channel, you can form long lasting relationships. Just know that there’s a spiritual aspect to it.

I love learning about this domain because for many years, one thing I believed was that morals come from the bible. However, people who do not read or follow the bible are not all immoral. Likewise, (and unfortunately so), people who do read the bible seems to use it to go down a destructive and harmful path.

The communal domain means that morals are a part of our spirituality, but not necessary only for people who are christians. This makes me happy because it’s something that makes sense, that doesn’t view God in a bad light and can also make peace with secularist.

There are many reasons why I think we as humans are bad at developing spiritually, but one reason I’ll point out is that we don’t link inter personal relations and morality with the communal domain of spirituality. We don’t realise this aspect of these things.

Environment domain

Environmental domain—beyond care and nurture for the physical and biological, to a sense of awe and wonder; for some, the notion of unity with the environment.


The indigenous people of America were good at this. They were one with nature. They were in awe of the nature surrounding them and some took it to far and worshiped nature. One of my purpose in life is to care for the people around me, the resources we share and also the animals that are under our mercy and rule. I’m not a tree climbing girl or an outdoors person, so this domain is one that I admit I need the most work on.

At the same time, I think these three domains are pretty difficult and there isn’t a lot of guidance for spiritual development. It’s a good thing that this year, I’m asking questions and I’m exploring spirituality in general but also on a personal note.

This is a journey I’m taking this year. A journey of self identity, self awareness but also of taking care of what I have and the friends in my life.

Trascendental -relation with something beyond

Transcendental domain—relationship of self with some-thing or some-One beyond the human level (i.e., ultimate concern, cosmic force, transcendent reality or God). This involves faith towards, adoration and worship of, the source of Mystery of the universe [41].

Russell Brand is an example of someone with a good relationship with the transcendence. If you watch any of his videos on youtube, you’ll soon be able to see how the transcendence, and his belief in something beyond that which we can see, has helped to shape and form the man he is today.

Transcendence is probably the domain that most people associate with spirituality with the exception of those who are “spiritual but not religious”.

Fun fact: I technically fall under this category as I don’t think of myself as religious, but I digress.

I used to be a panicky little squirrel who was concerned for people who didn’t know what would happen after they died. I was scared of hell. Today, I spit in hell’s open pit. But I’m still on edge a little bit. Like with WBC, it’s something I can’t completely let go of and if you don’t understand, you will when I write about my heavy heart.

I think I was going about things the wrong way. It’s not the transcendent domain that’s the important bit, it’s all the other domains that are actually important to everyone even to secularists.

Because we all will go through death but no one ever talks about it.

We all have questions but no one seems to provide us with answers.

We all want good relationships but there are a lot that gets in the way of that.

So, I think, personally, I should focus on the other three domains, connect with this world that I’m in, this life that I have right now, develop in these three domains and hopefully one day, help others develop spirituality in these domains too.





You realise the top buttons work, right?

Hey everyone, today is a lighter post which seems appropriate since it’s the last time I’m going to write about or even mention WBC. I mean, I won’t forget them and I will probably write about them in the future but that’s in the far distance.

I’d like to quickly point you to the links at the top of my website which are where I keep all my pages for your convenience. Today’s post is actually at the top under the heading, “company”.

It’s a poem about WBC. It could just as easily have been under the heading, “care”, but I thought “company” was a good reminder that the world gets very small when we have to share it with someone we hate.

So, as hard a sit might be, let’s not have hatred in our hearts. Let’s surround ourselves with good company, and not haters.

One last thing about WBC and other haters out there

I feel sorry for them. Even more than my other emotions, disgust, hatred, anger, sadness, above all of them, I pity them. A lot.


Please keep checking the top links for more pages. I will write a mix of pages and posts. Thanks.

A reminder

I appreciate everyone who reads and likes my blog. I would love to return the favour so if you happen to read something of mine that you like, please leave a comment. This is the easier way for me to go to your blog because when I click on your icon, I get directed to Gravatar. But when I click on your name, it directs me to your website.


Brainwashed by the Westboro Baptist Church Part 1/2

I want to talk about a particular family who joined the Westbaro Baptist Church. It is the Drain family. One week ago, I wrote a post on a woman who left that cult after seven years and her name was Lauren Drain. Yes, this is in fact, about the story of her family and how they came to WBC in Topeka.

It all started when Steve Drain went to Topeka to create a documentary that he called, “Hatemongers”. His intention was rational, a reason that most people who support and rally for. He wanted to make a documentary on WBC that would expose them for what they were.-Snake oil sales men.


To go from his original intentions, to where he is now and what he’s doing now, is a scary thing and it makes me think twice about entering WBC. By the way, the only reason why I would enter that church would be to write a documentary on the hate mongers. Although, I don’t think they need a book made about them.

WBC is a primitive church meaning it follows the way of what the christian church was like in the old days. This is ‘old days’ as in when the LGBT could not marry and homosexuals were thrown in jail or even put to death.


I’m going to say it again-

WBC breaks apart families, not just their own but other families that comes in their cult.

This is one reason why I’m speaking out against WBC and all of their man-made views on everyone. I don’t know how a civil rights lawyer could start a hate cult this big and influential.

A bit of context:

Fred Phelps used to be a good guy once upon a time

He was a civil rights lawyer who fought for African-Americans who claims discrimination in the school or anywhere else. No white lawyer would defend them, so that’s what Fred Phelps did. This is one example of it being okay to go against the grain or the norm, and fight for what you believe.

Then Fred committed perjury and lost his licence. What a shocker that he carries anger towards everyone. But despite the good that he had done in the past, it isn’t enough to condone his present acts now.

And going against the grain this time, will not work in his favour. I was going to write a post on part two of Vice’s documentary, but I’ve decided you can search for the video yourself on youtube. Because I think I’ve said enough.-at least for now. But this isn’t over because as long as there are people like Fred Phelps, who do and say things in the name of the God whom I worship and believe in, I will keep speaking up and I will keep writing about it so that the world may know that this is not okay and I will not sweep this under the rug.




My life post-cult: Back to normality

Lauren Drain belonged to one of the few families who came into WBC instead of being born into it. I can’t say much except reiterate what Lauren says in this video on “Chicago ideas week”.

Here are a few issues that she touches on and that I want to talk about.

It’s okay to ask questions

This is something I had to slowly learn and experience myself as a christian and it is why this year’s blog theme is on spirituality. It’s because I’m not afraid anymore to ask questions. I can ask big, small or ridiculous questions. God doesn’t mind. God doesn’t get intimated by them being asked, so I’m not going to be scared by being the one to ask these questions. A lot of churches don’t like people asking questions that they can’t answer but in WBC, this is brought to the extreme.

If we don’t ask questions, then we lose the chance to become critical thinkers and to change the world in a good way.

WBC tears families apart

I’ve covered this a little bit though I didn’t address it like I am doing now. WBC tears apart their own family (Phelps) and other families who are brought into this lie, this deluded fantasy.

I’ve watched enough WBC videos to know that time and time again, WBC breaks up families. They don’t want any communication with their own family members who have been cast out of the church.

No wonder it’s difficult to leave! It’s not that they believe the signs they’re holding up or feel comfortable with praying for people to die.  But they’re there to stay with their family. Those people who were forced to leave, must miss their parents and siblings and friends.

But at the same time, it’s better to take your chances with the outside world than to remain in a really bad life with so much judgement and limitations.

It’s worse on the inside than it is on the outside

Lauren gave a brief insight into what life is like inside the church and it seems that they’re more judgemental to each other than they are to the funerals they picket at and generally the people they annoy, argue and then sue.

But let’s be cautious to celebrate or slow to smile at this because, well, at the end of the day, we’re all human, we all (or most of us) come from flawed and dysfunctional families. This is just like any dysfunctional family, it’s just ten times worse. That’s all.

So while they’ve evoked many emotions in me over the weeks that I’ve learned and written about them, I must say, my biggest emotion I feel towards them is pity. I feel sorry for them and this family, who hate everyone including themselves.

I’m going to take a break from writing about WBC so expect something new next week and then I’ll continue for maybe one or two more weeks. I don’t want to give them more publicity after all.

What do you think about WBC or about Lauren so far? Would you ever join a cult? If you liked this blog post, please hit the like and follow button. If you have any questions or comments, please leave them too. I’d love to hear from you.



Same sex attraction and the christian girl Ep 2.

What to do when you’re a Christian lesbian

I think my title is a lot shorter and to the point. It might even lead to a helpful article for lesbian Christians. Not that I’m in a position to give advice. This post is less a response and more an apology. Yes, it is time for yet another apology from me on behalf of Christians but NOT MORMONS. Mormons are their own thing.

I’m sorry, you confused LGBT teenagers

At around10:59 in Jimmy’s video, he points out how there are a lot of dead LGBT teenagers and most of them were conflicted between their sexual identity and orientation, and the religion that they grew up to believe in. He’s responding to a cherry that Girl Defined had picked. (Uh, talking about a bible verse), from 1 Cor 10:3. It’s about how God’s not going to give you anything you can’t handle.

I grew up with this verse and this belief that I won’t ever get any struggles or problems that I couldn’t handle with God. One ‘problem’ I had to handle growing up was not having a dad. He died when I was four. Funny how I remember how old I was when he died. I used to think that God thought I, a four-year-old, was strong because I could ‘handle’ the problem of not having a Dad. That’s some twisted thinking and again, really dangerous as well.

There are people who go through stuff including the death of a parent and also divorce to name another one, without having a relationship with God. Conversely, there are Christians who go to church, who went through divorce and had absolutely no support whatsoever.

What I’m saying is, you don’t need to know God, to be able to go through a tragedy and come out of it alive. Being a Christian and in a church might actually have the opposite effect since church people can be judgemental and “good-intentional” snakes. But maybe God helps and certainly, he helped me since the ‘struggle’ I had to deal with was about death. God certainly helps a little bit with that.

Moving onto my apology to the LGBT people-sorry. While I agree with Jimmy and can’t say that I’m in your shoes, it sucks. People suck and Christians suck and I genuinely hope that, whether or not you’ve been brought up religiously, that you find some sort of peace and self-acceptance with who you are and what you identify yourself to be.

You are special, you are unique, and it gets better.

Now, I know this is a huge jump from the above “it gets better” video, but this next video is to show you, and to everyone, that on some level, I do understand. -only because I’ve been suicidal before (which doesn’t really go away), and as someone who’s been bullied for not being talkative, or not being “alive” enough or even just for the colour of my hair, I want to say to you, that we’re special, unique and different and that’s okay, because we are who we are…You’ll understand after the video

Why did God make woman? Ep. 1

Welcome to my blog, “No excuses”! This used to be a blog on writing but is now on spirituality and other important topics. Today’s post is a response to a blog post called “Why did God make woman?” by Biblical Gender Roles and a response to a video by Mr Atheist, that responds to this blog post. You don’t need to click the link because the youtube video can be found in this post.

But first, please remember to like, follow and comment. Yeah, I’m that kinda person now. SO ANNOYING.

Why did God make woman?

This is such a good and profound question. Let’s see if I can answer before I get into the video and blog post. God made women, for example, me, so that I can do good works on earth, to take care of his creation including the land, people and animals, and to overall, enjoy the life that he has given me. Yeah, that sounds about right. Yes? No? Wait, what? You’re saying no?

No, you’re not right Ching Ern. But first, here’s a definition of progressive revelation.

Progressive revelation is like being given a story or an account of something and then later getting a flashback or a different viewpoint which gives you a different angle or revelation on the story. If this doesn’t make sense, then watch the video and Jimmy will read the blog post to you.

The first account of creation can be found in Genesis 1. The second account that gives us a progressive revelation, can be found in Genesis 2.

What revelations do we find?

We find that:

  1. It is not good for man to be alone
  2. Man was created first before woman
  3. Adam looked at all the animals and didn’t find a suitable helper
  4. Eve and therefore women were created for men.
  5. Women were created to be helpers and for companionship

This blog-writer got these points from the KJV bible. My AMP (amplified) version of the bible of the same verses says that:

(Gen 2:18-23 AMP)

  1. Adam needed a helper, someone who balanced him, or a counterpart
  2. none of the animals were a suitable companion (note, how it says companion but NOT sexual partner).
  3. The word “helper” indicates a role, not a woman’s value. Adam needed someone who was like himself, who was intelligent and equal in value but with different qualities, who could subdue the earth together with him. This was taken from a footnote of the AMP bible.
  4. God causes Adam to fall into a deep sleep and He took one of Adam’s ribs to create Eve. Another footnote says that if God had taken a piece of Adam’s head, then this implied women were superior, if God had taken a piece of Adam’s toe, then this implied woman were inferior. But to take the rib, a piece from Adam’s side, implied equality and mutual respect. It doesn’t imply being a side piece, hahaha.  (According to my footnote, Martin Luther King had observed this but I’m not sure if he actually did since I can’t at the moment, find evidence of him saying this).

So, I’d like to first apologise. Here goes:

  1. There are a lot of stupid christians in the world
  2. I can’t say that I’m any smarter but
  3. At least I hope that my content here is smart and agreeable, instead of just sounding like sound advice or facts…or complete trash.
  4. I’m sorry for this blog, that confirms literally every atheist who says that the bible is very misogynistic. 
  5. and I’m sorry that I’m now going to be a hypocrite by saying my thoughts on this

This is what I believe:

There are many versions of the bible which leaves the bible open for interpretation. I trust the AMP because it tries its best to demonstrate how people understood the bible in its original language. Now, English isn’t a very good language to translate to because English doesn’t have enough words to convey the same meaning as the original language.

I trust the AMP when it explains that men and women were created equal and with mutual respect, to both subjugate and take dominion over the earth. It doesn’t mean that the KJV is not an accurate Bible translation or version. But, it does mean that people can get different interpretations of the bible depending on which Bible version they use, how deeply they study the actual meaning of words, and whether or not they are actually qualified to give an accurate not-man-made interpretation of the bible.

And that’s why this blog that I’m responding to, and other things like this, are so dangerous to both themselves and society-they take a few verses from the bible and utterly twist the verses to conform to their way of thinking and indoctrination. I hope that as I do more of these blog posts, that you’ll find I don’t do that, but I try my best to actually see the whole picture instead of focussing on a few verses.

By golly, it seems like I’m going to need to do a series on this instead of just one blog post. 🙂 That’s fine because- more content. So this is the end of my blog post, episode one of “Why did God create woman?”

And by the way, it’s “women”, plural, not just Eve. WOMEN.

Let’s shake off the intensity-ness that comes from feminism and the fight for equality and watch a cat on top of a roomba, in a shark costume, chasing a duck.

Happy Lunar new year!

I didn’t write a New Year’s post but I’m on time to CNY (Chinese or Lunar new year), and that’s what’s most important. Although technically, 2019 began on October 15th, the day I turned 22.


Here are a few changes that I intend to make on my blog:

  1. More of Jesus, less of me

I will be writing more on spirituality instead of on random things that are happening in my life. But I’ll still be random and stuff, just not as often as before.

2. Colours

Should I choose a different look for my blog? I definitely feel like I need a new outlook on life. We’ll see but I’m not paying for anything.

3. Connection

Please! I’m so lonely here! Please do connect with me this year by leaving comments down below. I’m also going to be more annoying by reminding you to follow me if you like my content, and comment if you like…uh…my personality?

And I’m also going to be a reader. It’s not fair on anyone if I only ask for readers and I myself don’t read. Fun fact: I’m ten times more likely to read and comment on your blog if you do the same first. Just saying. And hinting. Wink.

4. Write about what matters

This is similar to the 1st bullet point except that apart from spirituality, I’ll be covering topics that may not personally interest me but my stance and my viewpoints on these topics are important. I compare this to that poem about how the Jews were mistreated and no one did anything and then finally we were mistreated and there was no one left to help us. Yeah, it’s like that. Gotta care about the jews. I’ll see if I can find the original poem because my memory of it is not good enough.

5. Apologies

Lots of apologies are coming your way because of some of my blog posts which advocates on views that I no longer hold. Apologies also, as a Christian. I may not have done anything wrong personally but by calling myself a Christian, I’m partially responsible for all the sh*t that’s out there in the world.

6. You may also see more cussing and slang. I’m letting my hair down this 2019.

I hope I don’t cuss too much because if it’s ‘normal’, then it loses its significance.

So there you have it. 6 changes coming to this blog. I’m excited. I’m happy. I’m cringing and in pain a little bit. Like a massage.